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Here's to the crabgrass
Here's to the mortgage
In fact here's to Suburbia
Lay down your briefcase
Far from the rat race
Where nothing can disturb ya
Uncomplicated
It's what we waited
For so long in this city
Come let us go there
Live like Thoreau there
A life of sweet simplicity
Did you set the thermostat
No I don't know where it's at
Tuesday the Cub Scouts meet again
Walk the dog and cut the grass
Take the kids to dancing class
Jim's Little League got beat again
Can't keep a maid here
No matter what they're paid here
The place has bad publicity
Why did we move here
Don't you remember
To live in sweet simplicity
Here's to mosquitos
Clam dip and Fritos
To golf and bridge and scuba there
Men wearing knee pants
Women in Capri pants
Discussing what's with Cuba there
Each big appliance
Treats you with defiance
Until it finally falls apart
Call the repairman
In a week he's there man
To knock your kitchen walls apart
Tommy's got a bloody nose
Gotta fix the garden hose
Book Of The Month Club came today
Didn't read the last one yet
Yes you did but you forget
Oh well they're all the same today
Here's Mrs Ritter
She's the baby sitter
Tonight we're going joyously
Back to the city
Where life is gay and witty
Back to the noise there
That everyone enjoys there
Back to the crush there
Hurry let us rush there
Back to the rat race
Don't forget your briefcase
Back in the groove there
Say why don't we move there
Away from all of this
Sweet simplicity