They rose from the grave
On a blood-red night
Not craving flesh
But fresh crops in sight
They don't want brains
They don't want meat
They shuffle the streets
Screaming,"We want wheat!"
Carrots and cabbage
Their eyes turn green
Gnawing on lettuce
Like a gory machine
You can run, you can hide
But don't you forget
They'll tear down your door
For a chia seed set!
Oh no! The vegan dead!
They don't want brains
They want your bread!
Hide your gardens
Block the door
They're coming back
For quinoa and more!
Tofu terrors
With kale-stained
Teeth
Ripping out roots
From the ground beneath
They feast on fields
They stalk the land
Holding avocados
In each undead hand
Kombucha's dripping from lifeless lips
A hunger no mortal could ever eclipse
You can beg, you can plead
But it's all in vain
They just want lentils
Inside of your brain!
Oh no! The vegan dead!
They don't want brains
They want your bread!
Hide your gardens
Block the door
They're coming back
For quinoa and more!
Soy milk rivers run
Through the night
A world overrun
No meat in sight
They chant in the dark
A sinister creed:
"No more slaughter
Just plant-based feed!"
The last butcher's closed
The cows roam free
The vegan dead reign eternally!
If you hear them moan
Just turn and flee
Before they force-feed kale to thee!
(Slow fade-out with eerie moaning:
Kaaaaale Tofuuuu)