TONIGHT’S GONNA CHANGE MY WHOLE LIFE STORY
A MOMENT OF UNMATCHED MAGNITUDE
IT’S FINALLY TIME TO TASTE THE GLORY
I’M GONNA TOUCH A BOOB!
GONNA TREAT MY GUY SO FINE AND FANCY
WE’LL EAT OFF PLATES LIKE ROYALTY
I’LL BE SO SUAVE HE’LL SHIT HIS PANTS
HE WON’T BELIEVE IT’S ME
I’M DONE WITH MY WIMPY-ASS FAMILY
I’M TAKING MY FATE IN MY HANDS
I’M SICK OF THE CODDLING AND EMOTIONAL SWADDLING
TONIGHT I’LL BECOME A MAN
I GOT A DATE WITH DESTINY
THERE’S NO WAY IT CAN’T GO RIGHT
EVERYTHING’S GONNA BE MAGICAL TONIGHT
I’M GIVING THIS SHABBAT
EVERYTHING THIS OL’GIRL’S GOT
I’LL BE A DAZZLING, BRISKET-BEARING JUDAIC QUEEN
EVERY RABBI’S DREAM!
OHHH, I GOT A HUNCH THERE’S GOOD THINGS COMING
THE FUTURE IS LOOKING BRIGHT
I’LL BE A MANLY, KICK-ASS DUDE
FOR ONCE NOT A FILTHY, LOW-CLASS RUBE
I’LL BE A BOY WHO TOUCHED A BOOB
AFTER TONIIIIIIIIGHT!