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I'm Still Hurting - ArlenaZara
I'm sitting at the bar now
with friends around the table
I'm trying to be strong for them
trying to be stable
They talk about their future plans
their loves both old and new
And I just sit in silence thinking about you
The music here is loud tonight
the drinks are pouring fast
Trying to drown the memory of the love we thought would last
I nod my head and fake a smile
I make a little joke
But I'm still hurting baby
right beneath the skin
A quiet constant agony of where you used to be within
The world thinks I'm mended
the world thinks I am fine
But every breath is heavy and every thought is mine
To bear the silent suffering
this deeply cutting pain
Like a bruise that never fades beneath the pouring rain
Yeah I'm still hurting
and I don't know
when the healing starts
I sleep with your old t-shirt
wrapped up in the scent
A hollow fragile comfort for the time that we both spent
I keep the porch light on for you
a habit hard to break
A beacon for a ghost I know won't return for goodness sake
The pain is not a sharp thing
it's not a sudden crack
It's just the slow consistent knowledge that you're not coming back
And knowing doesn't ease the ache
it doesn't help the time
It just makes the quiet moments feel like a silent
Hurting baby
right beneath the skin
A quiet constant agony of where you used to be within
The world thinks I'm mended
the world thinks I am fine
But every breath is heavy and every thought is mine
To bear the silent suffering
this deeply cutting pain
Like a bruise that never fades beneath the pouring rain
Yeah I'm still hurting
and I don't know
when the healing starts
I don't want the quick fix
I don't want the easy way
I just want the honesty of getting through the day
With the truth held in my hands
that this is where I am
A broken hurting woman lost within the jam
Cause I'm still hurting baby
right beneath the skin
A quiet constant agony of where you used to be within
The world thinks I'm mended
the world thinks I am fine
But every breath is heavy and every thought is mine
To bear the silent suffering
this deeply cutting pain
Like a bruise that never fades beneath the pouring rain
Yeah I'm still hurting
and I don't know
when the healing starts
I'm still hurting
and the anchor is gone
I'm still hurting
waiting for the dawn
I'm still hurting
and I don't know how to heal
The only thing I feel
is that I'm
still hurting