It's a God awful small affair To the girl with the mousy hair But her mummy is yelling "No" While her daddy has told her to go Now her friend is nowhere to be seen As she walks through her sunken dream To the seat with the clearest view As she walks to the silver screen But the film is a saddenin' bore 'Cause she's watched it ten times or more She could spit in the eyes of fools As they ask her to focus on Sailors fighting in the dance hall Oh man look at those cavemen go It's the freakiest show Take a look at the Lawman Beatin' up the wrong guy Oh man wonder if he'll ever know He's in the best selling show Is there life on Mars It's on America's tortured brow Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow And the workers have struck for fame 'Cause Lennon's on sale again See the mice in their million hordes From Ibiza to the Norfolk Broads Rule Britannia is out of bounds To my mother my dog and clowns But the film is a saddenin' bore 'Cause I wrote it ten times or more It's about to be writ again As I ask you to focus on Sailors fighting in the dance hall Oh man look at those cavemen go It's the freakiest show Take a look at the Lawman Beatin' up the wrong guy Oh man wonder if he'll ever know He's in the best sellin' show Is there life on Mars